With the many risks involved for one's children nowadays, it's no wonder more and more parents are not allowing their teenage children, especially the girls, to have their friends spend the night at their house.
But in old Guam (and the Northern Marianas), and even up till today, a slice of old Chamorro home life was that you never knew who would show up and spend the night in your home.
The average home in the Marianas of old consisted of one, maybe two, rooms. Both the kitchen and the toilet were outside, in separate places. Thus, all you needed inside the house was a floor to spread the guåfak (woven mat), a corner for baskets or boxes (maybe a kaohao, a wooden chest) where clothes and personal effects could be stored and maybe a table or chest of drawers, often topped with religious statues and the kåndet Yu'us (the lamp or candle that burned all the time).
Except in the homes of the more affluent, which had separate rooms, privacy in the average Chamorro one-room house was almost negligible. At night, everybody slept on the floor wherever you found a spot. One night it was your brother lying next to you, the next night it was your spinster auntie. There could be as many as a dozen people snoring away just inches from you.
But some nights, you didn't know who you were sleeping next to until you woke up the next morning.
"Kalan i chalan ha' i gima'-måme," said one old lady to me years ago. "Our house was like the street." Just as people freely walk the streets, people came in and out of their house at will. No one worried about security; "Tåya' para ma såkke." "There was nothing to steal," she said.
Relatives would come visit at night and end up just sleeping on the floor when the hour got late. Good friends were also accorded the same courtesy if they came to visit at night.
It could be that a man came over to spend the night because the next day he would accompany the father of the house to the ranch to work on some project and they'd head out early. "Chågo' i lanchon-måme, ya tåftaf siempre i hinanao-ñiha si tatå-ho yan i amigu-ña. Ya siempre ma udai i dos gi karetan tatå-ho." "Our ranch was far, and they would journey early in the day, my father and his friend. And they'd surely ride in my father's cart."
"Pues maolek-ña yanggen maigo' ha' i taotao giya hame ya mungnga si tatå-ho man nangga gi sigiente dia. Ya mås angokuyon yanggen gagaige ha' i amigu-ña gi gima'-måme gigon ha' makmåta i dos." "So it was better that the man sleep just at our house and my father wouldn't need to wait for him the next day. And it was more dependable if the man were right there at our house as soon as the two woke up."
A few times, someone in trouble would end up sleeping at their house. "Un biåhe, mumu i primu-ho yan si tatå-ña sa' guaha båba bidå-ña si primu-ho. Måtto giya hame ya sumåga giya hame unos kuåntos dias asta ke pumås yan si tatå-ña." "One time, my cousin and his dad fought because my cousin did something wrong. He came to our place and stayed a few days until he and his dad made peace."
In other families, relatives or friends who were sort of free spirits could end up sleeping a night or two in your home. These were often single people with no home of their own, who ventured from the house of one relative or friend to another. These people were thus never a burden to just one family, as they moved around. But that also meant you never knew when they'd show up.
Some relatives, especially older ones, who lived far away, would come and spend two weeks at your house, in order to keep close to your side of the family. "Guaha primå-ña si nanå-ho ni sumåga Sumay. Dos pat tres biåhe kada såkkan, siempre måtto giya hame para u såga un semåna pat dos." The mother had a female cousin. Since the woman lived in Sumay, and her family lived in Hagåtña, she'd stay with them two or three times a year to keep the family ties close.
This reminded me of my grandmother's cousin Carmen Guzmán. Though cousins, they acted more like sisters. Tan Carmen lived in Santa Rita, but two or three times a year all of a sudden there she was in our kitchen, and she'd live with us for a week or two. Tan Carmen had her own home and her own bedroom in that home, but she wanted to stay close to my grandmother. I never knew when she'd appear all of a sudden, but I always enjoyed her being around.
There was no spare bedroom for guests; not even a spare bed. So Tan Carmen would sleep on the same bed as my grandmother's spinster sister. I used to laugh when I was a small boy because it looked funny to me how two old ladies would be sleeping on the same bed, one head lying north and the other head lying south, which meant that both ladies' feet were in front of each other's faces.
Today, with hardships abounding all the more with modern life; with economic hardships, losing one's home, being evicted from one's apartment; with domestic troubles increasing with drug abuse and an unstable family life; it's no wonder that even today homes can be like an airport with people coming and going in need of a place to stay the night. You never know who will be sleeping on the couch tonight.
But this started a long, long time ago, even if it happened in the old days in more tranquil circumstances.
No comments:
Post a Comment